Life
My brother asked my dad what I do for work and he said, ‘Send and receive emails.
Adulting probably isnt quite what you thought it would be.
Well, as it turns out, everyones kind of just winging it.
Sometimescommon knowledge isnt so common.
Like, youre saying weallhave to scrounge around and figure out what to eat for dinnereverysinglenight?!
And if we had work yesterday, westillhave to come in tomorrow?
Seems a little much.
These posts on X have the best jokes for adults that will make you laugh and feel seen.
Whats your favorite childhood memory?
Me: Not paying bills.
@wallstmemes
Ahh, the good life.
If only you knew how much youd miss those days before they were gone.
When youre a kid you think coffee is the most adult drink[.]
Then as a teenager you think alcohol is really the cool adult drink.
Then you finally become an adult and realize that all along, it was water.
Water is the ultimate adult drink.
Many adults still struggle with this one.
Me trying to get 8 hours of sleep in just 3 hours.
@iHad2GoGetit
What do you mean its impossible to geteight hours of sleepin three?
This whole adulthood thing seems entirely too rigged.
Welcome to adulthood: being tired and being awake are the same thing.
@NotTodayEric
Maybe this wouldnt happen if you could stuff a whole nights sleep in three hours.
Or if you kept thatbedtime procrastinationin check.
(Hint: put the phone down and try picking up a book before bed.)
Adulting is asking for bills to be paid as a Christmas gift.
@Jameca2011
Whats that they say about gifts that you want versus ones that you need?
Well, this one is both.
You need your bills to be paid and you surely want them to be taken care of too.
Its not that unrealistic, is it?
Or what if you have to help someone move and this box perfectly fits their collection of limited-editionromantasy books?
Better keep it just in case.
Me at 40: Pretty excited about this new dish sponge.
Its the little things.
Injuries as an adult: slept wrong[,] sat too long[,] coughed.
@XplodingUnicorn
Some adult jokes are a laugh-until-you-cry moment.
This is one of those moments.
Those years of being made of rubber were far too underappreciated.
Being an adult is so hard wtf.
That you just had like… no idea was a thing.
Now the only question is how did they actually do it all?
You mean to say that no one was reminding you to change your dishwasher filter?
Or better yet, telling you that dishwashershavefilters?
So turns out being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.
@_shaarlyy
Honestly, Google is out here saving lives.
But youll never just know.
Just knowing was for your parents.
Could it be because they actually labeled things?
No, that couldnt be it.
@helgagrace
Having a clean, minimalistic house is overrated anyway.
Thank goodness for themaximalistmovement because where were these home decor influencers putting all of their table pile stuff?
Adulting is realizing you’ve got the option to’t skip work like you skipped classes.
@hashjenni
Well, you could.
But skipping work will come back to bite you harder than detention ever would.
At least you could eat lunch in there.
Welcome to adulthood.
You get mad when they rearrange your grocery store now.
@DanRegan_Comedy
The adult math is absolutely mathing.
Which is, sorry, so past your bedtime.
@roastmalone_
Wheres the joke?
The woman is speaking facts.
Sorry TLC, theres no room for scrub-haters in this economy.
Grocery shopping in 2004: Clip coupons out of Sunday newspaper to use at checkout.
@AbbyHasIssues
Adulting in the early aughts seemed so much easier.
Straightforward couponsandthe possibility ofhome ownershipwith onlyonefull-time job?
Paid rent so I’ll be at home enjoying my purchase for the rest of the month.
@Highoffantt
Its so nice, youll probably want to repurchase next month too.
And even the month after that, who knows?
Might as well tell your friends its about a six- to 12-month commitment youll be enjoying.
The biggest scam of adulthood is the price of a rug.
Or theres always the option of doubling it up as your bed since it costs about that much.
@adultproblem
And what a relief a valid excuse to stay home is.
Its almost as good as canceled plans.
My brother asked my dad what I do for work and he said send and receive emails.
@jodecicry
To be fair, hes not wrong.
But there is also the occasional Zoom meeting to spice things up every now and then, right?
It’s late.
Should I go to bed or eat a block of cheese?
@lmegordon
Thats the thing about being an adult.
Want a whole block of cheese before bed?
Nobodys going to stop you.
Its important to reward yourself for your accomplishments.
@AbbyHasIssues
Seems reasonable.
If youre not going to reward yourself for your hard work, whats to motivate you to keep going?
Guys being an adult sucks ur just expected to know things (I DONT KNOW ANYTHING).
@nxdiamusic
Sorry but when was the sign-up for the class?
How does everyone know all these life things?
@stfuayen
And thats probably why youre spending all your money on Postmates.
The kids really dont know how good theyve got it.
Remember, you could disappear into an overgrown forest whenever you want.
You’re an adult.
@DothTheDoth
Honestly, tempting.
Not that disappearing into the woods would solveeveryproblem, but the reminder of the possibility is nice.
Being an adult is a little bit out of my price range right now.
@thatkelligirll
For real, is there a refund on adulthood?
It seems like kind of a rip-off.
The false advertising is staggering.
Being an adult is having the we have food at home talk with yourself.
@Bootlegkhaled
*Being a responsible adult.
you might always choose to ignore yourself and get takeout anyway.
And thats the few beauties of being a grown-up.
Plus, theres a good chance the food at home is ketchup, freezer-burnt broccoli, and ice.
@SupJess__
When does one level up from beginner adult to adulty adult?
Apparently, it doesnt happen overnight.
@brianluebben
Its truly one of the most eye-opening, horrifying, yet mesmerizing experiences of adulthood.
But of course, you still see your past teachers as the exception.
They wereteachers, not regular people like your rowdy friends… who are also teachers.
@xcolorstorm
Is that a flu ache or just joint pain?
Are you usually this phlegmy when you wake up?
Its almost like a fun little guessing game to get you going in the morning.
@Kozher_FG
Life is tiring.
This article was originally published onMay 17, 2024
