Ahead of the release ofLies and Weddings, Kwan sat down with Bustle.
Im loving the book, and Im going to confess that Im not done yet.
Im trying to savor it.
Its been keeping me company every morning and night.
Thats what it should be.
Its like a piece of chocolate.
You eat some whenever you want.
Im also learning so much.
Im always very amused and tickled when people have that reaction.
An author recently told me that reading my books keeps her Google search suggestions interesting.
Really, its all the trash thats in my mind.
I have a trash-can brain for useless information.
You know the saying One mans trash …
Im talking like the people who make the Popes socks.
Thats whats in my brain.
In very limited, tiny doses.
I just want to put that caveat out there.
The world of my books is not my everyday life.
Still, who else would know the rules of, like, how to behave on a G6?
Have you ever been in a situation like that?
Where was the stopover?
That would be incriminating.
I have to be a good guest if I want to be invited back.
But look youre going where they want to go.
Youre basically their captive.
So, you know, be careful what you wish for.
People think this world is a fantasy.
That, to me, is whats interesting.
Its their plane, you wait for them to start burning fuel.
The owner was running errands.
And youre like, Oh, I thought this is gonna be the efficient way to travel.
But you cant complain.
Whats the next step?
Some people do it themselves.
We were in Italy, and the captain took us to where no other boats or tourists could go.
At the end of the day, we tried to tip the captain.
We left a tip as we walked off.
The crew came running back after us, like, we will not take your money.
What would you say to someone looking to advance in the game of life by befriending such people?
Do you have any advice?
The most important thing is always just to be yourself and be authentically you.
Real friendships, real chemistry, you cant fake.
So I wouldnt know how to give that kind of advice.
Its not, like, go hang out atZero Bond.
Its sort of the opposite.
Im really bad at schmoozing.
I have a hard time believing that.
Some people are so well connected.
Theyre yacht-hopping and island-hopping and this-and-that hopping.
Im really not that person.
Once in a lifetime experiences, like that boat day in Italy, I dont take for granted.
The vast majority of my friends do not have yachts.
Unfortunately, in a lot of those circles, its hypercompetitive.
Its based on how much you have.
The minute you lose it, where are those so-called friends going to be?
Weve seen that time and time again.
Youve spent a lot of your professional life between New York and Los Angeles.
New Yorkers are way more active in that theyre much more social.
Theres a lot of emphasis on how you support the culture of New York.
Theres a lot of civic pride amongst the New Yorker 1 percents, and theyre really generous and philanthropic.
Barry Diller and Diane Von Furstenberg gave the citya whole island, you know.
There are different crowds the ballet crowd, the opera crowd, the art crowd but they intermingle.
There are a lot of overlapping circles.
L.A. is very home based.
All the socializing, I find, happens in homes, and its much more low key.
From what Ive observed, its also much more infrequent.
Theres no benefit season like there is in New York in the fall.
In L.A., one thing happens a week.
Its not a criticism, its an observation.
People are really doing their own thing.
What made you move here?
Film and television projects.
Also, I wanted to try a different life.
After two decades in New York, I wanted something new.
I didnt want to eat out every night.
What do you cook?
Do you have a signature dish?
I do a couple of pastas, too.
Very simple, one-pot punch in things.
But also, L.A. is a much more outdoors life, which is what I wanted.
Thats never an issue for me because I would never do something like that.
I would never reveal any of my friends intimate stories or secrets.
I don’t have any of that inclination or interest.
My intimate friends are not in the world I write about.
Of course, there is an observational aspect to what I do Im notthatimaginative.
Its never gotten to a point where its recognizable or in any way incriminating to anyone.
Least of all yourself.
This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
