The opposite, handling a friend who is jealous ofyoucan be even more uncomfortable at times.
But just because jealousy is common doesn’t mean it’s NBD.
In some cases, it can have dramatic consequences.
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So for those left wondering, why is my friend jealous of me?
A fear of abandonment could also be at play, says Nickerson.
You shouldn’t feel ashamed for experiencing jealousy in a friendship, it’s only natural.
“Jealousy gets a bad rap,” says licensed psychologistPauline Yeghnazar Peck.
Ph.D. “But it’s just an emotion sitting alongside all the other ones.
We often connect to people with whom we have shared values, hobbies, and world views.
With that similarity, it’s not uncommon to feel jealous.
But TBH, it isn’t always easy, says Peck.
“When you feel envious, you often want what someone else has.
When you feel jealous, you might feel suspicious of or competitive with others.
(you’re able to also turn to awheel of emotionsto help.)
“Are you coveting your friend’s accomplishments?
“Are you feeling competitive with a close friend?
You might be feeling insecure about your strengths and unique identity.”
making more of an effort to connect with your loved ones).
Avoid Being Hard On Yourself
You’re jealous of your friend?
“Again, jealousy is natural and a lot of people experience it,” says Devonish.
You are capable of experiencing multiple emotions at the same time.
Hence, you are not a bad person.”
“Taking a moment to name the feelings softens them,” says Peck.
When you do that, you don’t waste valuable energy trying not to feel how you feel.
“That just adds tension to the situation and rarely works.
Whatever you push away becomes amplified.
You don’t want to alienate those closest to you or put your friendships in jeopardy, says Devonish.
Keep in mind that with this jealousy often comes fear, low self-esteem, and even pain.
It doesn’t mean your friend is wishing ill on you or hoping to see you fail.
Are there certain things they’d prefer you keep to yourself?
Are they afraid they’re going to leave you behind?
“If your friend is jealous, you could kindly ask about it,” says Nickerson.
If so, c’mon tell me about it.'
Then listen and point out anything you hear that makes sense and you’re free to agree with.
Reassure your friend, offer support, and point out evidence or examples to contradict negative thinking.
You’re not keeping things from them; you’re setting up boundaries to protect them.
(After all, no one’s life is perfect 100 percent of the time.)
“Jealousy does not mean that your friend will sabotage your success,” says Devonish.
At the end of the day, because jealousy is an emotion, it will pass in time.
Take it fromAustrian poet Rainer Maria Rilke: “Just keep going.
No feeling is final.”
Jealousy isn’t exempt from this rule.
