Be vulnerable
Healthy friendships require vulnerability because it makes friends feel seen and loved, Nelson says.
Earley also suggests you go deeper with what youre willing to share.
Vulnerability catalyzes vulnerability, he says.
She discovered that what people want most from friends is for them to initiate.
When we feel like they arent reaching out to us, we wonder if we matter to them.
The best initiators dont just initiate contact and communication, but also social plans and get-togethers.
In the best friendships, however, everyone takes a turn.
According to Nelson, Both people need to be sharing whats going on in their life.
That means becoming comfortable with quiet pauses, learning to actively listen without interrupting and asking follow-up questions.
If youre the listener … you, too, deserve to be heard and seen.
Have more fun
Simply put, friends should have fun together.
All too often, we are in relationships that are low in positivity.
There is a lack of enjoyment, fun and laughter, Nelson says.
The best relationships are those that have so much positive emotions that we truly enjoy being together.
Its so important to express gratitude to your friends for being in your life.
Gratitude is especially important during periods of absence.
Its letting people know that you cherish the friendship, she says.
Thats just oppressive, Goldfarb says.
People dont want to be dominated like that …
It feels like, I know your life better than you.
Instead of advice, what friends often want when they share their struggles or worries is validation.
Most of our life stressors dont need immediate fixing.
When someone can say things like I know that feeling … we feel seen and accepted.
Embrace conflict and forgiveness
Friends fight.
